Mindful Monday – How to Deal with Dissapointment

Mindful Monday

WELCOME TO MINDFUL MONDAY

Each week I look at new or sometimes old things about myself on my journey to becoming more conscious about my life journey. I have found that being mindful encompasses the act of being watchful, aware, wary, heedful, alert, careful, or attentive, in whatever area in my life I feel it applies to, as I try to engage in the present.

disappointed

This past week I dealt with disappointment. Our vacation didn’t go as planned and you know with family dynamics and different personalities sometimes that is just how it evolves. Yes, this thing called disappointment happens to all of us. How do you choose to handle it? Of course, not everything can always go as you planned or hoped. That is a simple truth.

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Image credit: Healthyplace.com

How do you handle disappointment? Do you scream, cry, or hide?

For me, disappointment is one of those miserable feelings that are all wrapped up in anger, hurt, and sadness. Frustration is at the top of that list too… because most of the time if I experience disappointment it is based on things that are out of my control.

So, here’s what I did. Since I was exhausted and couldn’t think about the situation clearly, I took some extra long naps and watched HGTV. I relaxed in a couple of hot baths with a good book. At that point, I felt like I was ready to deal with my feelings.

bath time

I remembered my mindfulness journey and decided to experience the feelings, for whatever they were worth. It hurt like heck, but I knew I had to let my feelings surface. I didn’t try to change how I felt. Instead, I tried to be present in the moment and let the feelings roll around inside of me. Believe me, it wasn’t pretty.

Yet, I gave myself the time to deal with my emotions. I also showed that I cared about myself and my feelings. I was taking care of me!

Taking care of me

At that point, I was able to gain some perspective on the situation by stepping back from my personal feelings. I knew what had happened was not my fault. Yes, I felt sad at the change of events, although I realized that the decisions my husband and I made at the time were correct for us.

I always try to be open-hearted toward people. I came to realize that the negative feelings I had would pass. I chose to not wallow in the negativity because it does no good for anyone. Besides, I felt like I know my own heart and trust my instincts. In doing so, I have given myself the freedom of choice.

In this particular family situation, there is nothing else I can do. I made my thoughts known at the time. It is up to the other person to decide their next step.

Most times when something disappointing happens I feel like I want to hide and blame the person who disappointed me. This time, I decided to quit acting so naive. Things happen and I know I will be disappointed again. That is life and I need to start dealing with it.

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Image credit: Pinterest.com

Guess what? Those feelings of disappointment will pass. They are not forever.

Disappoint is a part of life.  It will happen again. And, when it does, I choose to be aware of my feelings and live in the present. Then, I can move on and refocus my goals. ❤

Image result for images of dealing with disappointment

Image credit: Pinterest.com

For more on dealing with disappointment check out psychologytoday.com.

healthy living

I had quite the set back on my weight loss journey. I was stressed and I ate. Pure and simple. Once those negative feelings passed I got my act together. I am back on track and pursuing my Weight Watchers plan.

I had a doctor’s visit and we discussed me learning a new skill… YOGA! Gentle stretching will help build up my core and will stop my back pain. Are you ready to go on that journey with me? Stay tuned… it should be quite entertaining.

See you soonHave a great week. I wish you all peace and joy in all you do! ❤

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Mindful Monday – P. S. I Forgive You, by D. G. Kaye

Welcome to Mindful Monday. Each week I look at new or sometimes old things about myself on my journey to becoming more conscious about my life journey. I have found that being mindful encompasses the act of being watchful, aware, wary, heedful, alert, careful, or attentive, in whatever area in my life I feel it applies to, as I try to engage in the present.

Come and join me on my journey. You never know what you will learn about yourself.

I have something different for you this week. It’s a book review of a novel that touched me deeply. The subject matter had to do with a journey and a liberation of pent up emotions that enabled the author to find peace. If that is not a mindful journey, I don’t know what is.

Mindfulness is about change, understanding, and acceptance of who we are and who we want to become. We all have a journey, and who we are as children changes through the years into adulthood. Perhaps it has to do with maturity, but we all get to a certain age where reflection leads to deeper understanding and forgiveness of the things we simply cannot change.

Please let me introduce:

  • Title:  P. S. I Forgive You – A Broken Legacy
  • Author: D.G. Kaye
  • File Size: 358 KB
  • Print Length: 107 Pages
  • Publisher: Self-Published by Author
  • Publication Date: 9/26/2016
  • Sold By: Amazon Digital Services LLC
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B01LWOYPRP
  • Formats: Paperback and Kindle
  • Goodreads
  • Genres: Parenting and Relationships, Family Literature, Biography, Memoirs

IN THE AUTHOR’S WORDS:

“I hurt for her. She wasn’t much of a mother, but she was still my mother.”

“Confronted with resurfacing feelings of guilt, D.G. Kaye is tormented by her decision to remain estranged from her dying emotionally abusive mother after resolving to banish her years ago, an event she has shared in her book Conflicted Hearts. In P.S. I Forgive You, Kaye takes us on a compelling, heartfelt journey as she seeks to understand the roots of her mother’s narcissism, let go of past hurts, and find forgiveness for both her mother and herself.

After struggling for decades to break free, Kaye has severed the unhealthy ties that bound her to her dominating mother—but now Kaye battles new confliction, as the guilt she harbors over her decision only increases as the end of her mother’s life draws near. Kaye once again struggles with her conscience and her feelings of being obligated to return to a painful past she thought she left behind.”

MY RECOMMENDATION:

How many of us come from dysfunctional families? I know I certainly came from one. However, when you are the child of a narcissistic mother, those wounds fester and bleed well into adulthood becoming baggage that hangs around your heart. Almost certainly, these feelings are accompanied by guilt and a desire to understand why a mother could treat her own flesh and blood in such a demeaning way. Especially, when you would never think of treating your own children with such disdain.

This is the author’s journey to redemption. She sets out to explain the reasons why her mother treated her and her siblings in such a derogatory manner. What she discovers is her own strength and determination to come to grips with the revelations that none of this treatment was her fault. The final realizations pivot the reader to experience the liberation of a survivor, first hand, with empathy and compassion for the author and her family.

I followed D. G. Kaye’s path into a state of mindfulness, where she focuses on the present while acknowledging and accepting her feelings and thoughts from the past. At times, I cried right along with the family, feeling old emotions of my own boil to the surface. Ultimately, the story ends when understanding is achieved and the only avenue left is that of forgiveness.

This is a poignant novel filled with inspiration and strength. By the end of the story, I felt like D. G. Kaye, and I had become close friends, and she was telling me that my hunt to dispell my own childhood demons was going to be all right. If you have a narcissistic family member, this is the book for you. Believe me, you will never feel alone again.

MY RATING:

Character Believability: 5
Flow and Pace: 5
Reader Engagement: 5
Reader Enrichment: 5
Reader Enjoyment: 5
Overall Rate: 5 out of 5 stars



Author, D.G. Kaye

About the Author

“D.G. Kaye was born and resides in Toronto, Canada. She is the author of Conflicted Hearts – A Daughter’s Quest for Solace From Emotional Guilt, Meno-What? – A Memoir, and Words We Carry. D.G. is a nonfiction/memoir writer. Kaye writes about her life experiences, matters of the heart and women’s issues.

D.G. writes to inspire others. Her writing encompasses stories taken from events she encountered in her own life and the lessons that were taken from them. Her sunny outlook on life developed from learning to overcomes some of the many obstacles that challenged her. From an emotionally neglected childhood to growing up with a narcissistic mother, leaving her with a severely deflated self-esteem, D.G. began seeking a path to rise above her issues. When she isn’t writing intimate memoirs, Kaye brings her natural sense of humor into her other works.

D.G. began writing when pen and paper became tools to express her pent-up emotions during a turbulent childhood. Her writing began as notes and cards she wrote for the people she loved and admired when she was afraid to use her voice.

Through the years, Kaye journaled about life, writing about her opinions on people and events and later began writing poetry and health articles for a Canadian magazine as her interest grew in natural healthcare. Kaye became interested in natural healing and remedies after encountering a few serious health issues. Against many odds, D.G. has overcome adversity several times throughout her life.

D.G. began writing books to share her stories and inspiration. Her compassion and life experiences inspire her to write from the heart. She looks for the good and the positive in everything and believes in paying it forward.

“For every kindness, there should be kindness in return, Wouldn’t that just make the world right?”

D.G.’s Favourite Saying: “Live. Laugh. Love …and don’t forget to breathe!”

When D.G. is not writing, she’s reading. Her favourite genres of reading are biographies, memoirs, writing and natural health. Kaye loves to read about people who overcome adversity, victories, and redemption and believes we have to keep learning–there is always room for improvement! She loves to cook, travel, and play poker (when she gets the chance).”

You can find D.G. on social media and her author and blog pages:
www.dgkayewriter.com
www.goodreads.com/dgkaye
www.amazon.com/author/dgkaye7
www.twitter.com/@pokercubster
www.facebook.com/dgkaye
www.about.me/d.g.kaye.writer
www.google.com/+DebbyDGKayeGies
www.linkedin.com/in/dgkaye7

Thanks for stopping by and offering your support. It always makes the path easier when we have friends along for the ride.

Remember… If you would like to join me with your mindful goals, please do. The whole idea is to start thinking about ways that you can get in touch with your own mindfulness needs and how it pertains to your life. Write about it. We all learn from each other’s experiences.

If you’d like, you can link to my post with a ping-back each week in a separate post on your own blog. I will add your blog to a list of Mindful Monday supporters that others can visit to gain motivation on each of my Mindful Monday posts. I’m happy to see you!

Until next week. Don’t forget to let me know how your week is going.